How to live a life you love

How to a life you love

Flavio Ballerini, Ph. D.

1. What life would you love to live?

This is a good place to begin: the beginning is a definition of what the life you would love to live looks like to you. In general, an awesome life is awesome because we feel that we excel and succeed in four domains: Relationships, prosperity, health (energy and vitality), and vocation (as in doing work that you love to do and matters to you).

Think about it: if you wake up with a spring in your step, next to a person you love, respect, admire and genuinely want to be with; if you have a satisfactory sex life with that person, and if you can plan your day according to what is actually important to you, instead of basing it on what your income allows you to do, how can you not love that? Add to that the ability to move, run, carry things (such as babies and grand-babies) and the certainty that your contribution to the world matters, for sure you will love that life.    

2. The problem:

Naturally you would want to live that life. You have always tried to get it but have not achieved it. In fact, research shows that most people never even figure out that they have a power so enormous that even their wildest dreamlife would look mediocre in comparison to what our true power would be capable of creating for ourselves and our loved ones.

So, we know that we want a certain type of life that we are not living, and we know that we have the power to create it. We also know that we are not there yet. Finally, we remember that most people are told that “ambition” is a negative thing; most people are told to squelch their desires, not enhance them. More on that later.  

3. Let’s talk about that power…

Moses parted the red sea…

Jesus talked about moving mountains…

More recently, how about the accomplishments of Lee Iacocca, who started the modern CEO phenomenon while turning Chrysler around? Steve jobs, Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg, created empires bigger than many countries.

Is that “power” only available to a few people, or do you and I also have it?

Can you think of a time when you accomplished something that was considered at the time to be impossible? Passing an exam, winning a game in high school, anything?

I am sure you can think of a powerful moment in your life. What made that moment possible? What is the power in you, or through you, that made that moment possible?

This is important, because if you can connect with that power frequently you can also create the life you would love to live.

4. So, what happened to that power? A power that you surely have

Well life happened. That is what life is about. Life is about distracting you away from that power. Life itself will always present you with enough opposition to your dreams to distract you away from your power.

Moses was abandoned by his parents…

Jesus’ life was in danger when he was born, the family had to flee to Egypt

Iacocca’s daughter was born very fragile

Steve jobs was given up for adoption

What about you? What is your story?

You started off just like me, I am sure, full of dreams and hopes. You were sure you would grow up and be successful… each year you thought things would get better. Have they?

They have not, I know.

5. Let’s get technical for a moment…

The mental, emotional and physical environment you were exposed to as a baby created a powerful imprint in your mind. That imprint forms what you later recognize as your self-image. That is literally how you see yourself. The only thing is that we are not aware of our own self-image… we forget our months and years as a baby, and we cannot relate what happened then to what is happening now.

As a youth and an adult, we function in auto mode. Do you know what I mean by auto mode?

Think of a thermostat, the type that controls the temperature in a typical home. There are 4 parts to the thermostat:

You have a sensor

A set-point

A comparator

An actuator

The sensor is a thermometer that measures the temperature in the room.

The comparator compares the actual temperature with what you want, called the set point.

If there is a difference between the two, the system can engage the cooling or the heating system as required, that is the actuator.

When I say we live in auto mode, I mean to say that we perceive our environment and situation through our senses and compare what we perceive to that self-image. If there is a difference between the two, we always act to recreate the feelings, the emotions, the vibrations we experienced as a baby.

Examples: man was born poor, became a millionaire. Lost it all in one transaction.

Woman was a smoker. Quit smoking, changed her life, got married, had babies, prospered. One day she was on vacation, happy at the beach, suddenly started smoking again. She goes into hypnosis and tells me “but my mom wants me to die” … later her mother confirmed the intention and attempt to abort her.

A baby boy is physically, emotionally and verbally abused by his mother. Later he gets married and his wife beats him up, and constantly calls him “garbage”. What did I do? I continuously apologized to my ex-wife and “forgave” her. I never reported her to the police, as one of my own therapists said: no baby boy would report his mother to the authorities.

I think you get the point here: on the outside we are grown-ups, sophisticated adults… our lives are drastically different today from what it was when we were months old. Yes, on the outside I said. Deep within, our lives FEEL just like we felt as babies.

You no longer want to continue living this way, you are ready for a change. What can you do?

6. Two pathways to change

Remember the idea of the thermostat? You can tolerate a difference between what you experience and what’s stored in your unconscious for a short time. It takes energy and power to enforce that difference, we call this will-power. Will power is to life what adrenalin is to the body: will power is powerful, but only for a short period of time. This is why we all begin projects and soon afterwards abandon them… diets, savings, etc. this is why most new years’ resolutions are dead within two weeks.

The two pathways to change are:

1. The brute force approach requires a ton of will of power. You must act consistently, over a long period of time, in a way that matches the results you want, hoping that eventually that subconscious self-image will change, and the effort needed to have an awesome life decreases. Remember: The effort needed to live the life you want is proportional to the difference between the subconscious self-image and the current circumstances.
2. A better way to produce a better life is to change the subconscious self-image directly. This option requires very skilled access to the subconscious portion of the mind. As the self-image changes, you naturally and effortlessly do what it takes to produce better results, no effort, no cravings, no anxiety… just awesome results.

7. How to change your subconscious self-image?

By definition, changing your subconscious self-image requires access to the subconscious portion of the mind. Very deep devotional prayer and true meditation will definitely produce results. Most people require about 20 years practicing meditation to change their lives significantly.

Another possibility to truly change your life is to use professional hypnosis. If you can find a professional hypnotist with 10+ years of experience, you have found an amazing resource.

Malcom Gladwell, in his book “The tipping point” explains that it takes 10000 hours of practice to master anything.

Daniel Coyle in his book “The talent code” explains that practice alone is not enough to master anything, you need something called “deep practice” to actually change your nervous system.

Flavio Ballerini, in his book “Awesome Again” explains how and what changes happen at a genetic and molecular level when you deep practice anything, from misery to greatness.

Professional, expert hypnosis is the fastest and most effective way to change your life.

Now, although true hypnosis looks like magic, it is not. It looks immediate, it is not. The mind is like a labyrinth… true change takes some doing because the mind has a number of ways of “staying the same” and maintaining “normalcy” … just as the body maintains homeostasis.

You can change your life by changing your self-image stored at the subconscious level of the mind by attending regular hypnotherapy sessions or by attending a special retreat such as the ones Orion Retreats organizes.

8. What is special about Orion Retreats?

What is special about the retreats we organize at Orion is that we can accomplish about one month of intense therapeutic transformation per retreat day. We do that because we are totally removed from everyday concerns and activities, and because we focus from morning till night on our personal transformation.

At Orion we take care of every detail, including travel, accommodations, food, everything, so you don’t have to. All of your focus and energy will be dedicated to your personal transformation.

Another feature of Orion Retreats is that we will have a great time, form lifelong friendships, and be pampered in style.

9. What about cost?

Yes, what about cost… most people assume that an Orion retreat would cost a lot because of everything that you get included with it, but it is not true. All told our retreats cost less than the equivalent in office therapy when the same outcomes are achieved. The Colombia retreat, for instance, in November 2020 costs less than $4000.00 from Miami, all inclusive.

There are no comparable experiences that I am aware of. Consider the small group size, the extreme level of individual attention, the expert hypnotherapy and coaching, the pampering, and all other details, from a pencil all the way to all the food you care to eat. We do not know of anything as complete as what we offer, at any price.

All of our Retreats are equivalently priced, despite the extreme quality of the experience, they are all extremely affordable.

10. How do I join a retreat?

Right now we are putting the finishing touches on the retreat to Colombia, on November 23-29, 2020. We only have 5 spots left for that retreat. Go to www.oriontravels.net for details. Feel free to send me a WhatsApp at 305-505-3279 if you have immediate questions.

My web site is www.flaviolife.com

For hypnotherapy go to www.flaviolife.com/center

For the Awesome Again Academy go to www.flaviolife.com/aaao

For transformational retreats go to www.oriontravels.net

To send me a WhatsApp: 305-505-3279

For email: [email protected]